Adopting a Child with Prenatal Alcohol Exposure
The Challenges Adoptive Parents Face when Raising a Child with FAS
May 9, 2009
For most adoptive parents, the addition of a new child to the family is a truly life changing experience. Children who have suffered from prenatal exposure to alcohol, however, often arrive with a spectrum of problems that overwhelms most parents.
FAS/E is an umbrella term describing the range of effects that can occur in an individual whose mother drank alcohol during pregnancy. Fetal Alcohol Syndrome has been identified as the leading cause of mental retardation and is 100% preventable (National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism).
As many adoptive parents will attest, children with prenatal alcohol exposure are both difficult and challenging to raise. A child who is quick to upset, slow to obey, impossible to calm or console, generally complaining about some discomfort or other and often sick would be hard enough without the rage disorders, lying, inability to read social cues, remember yesterday’s learning or express needs.
These children rarely reflect back the calm, happy, interactive impression of a well-cared-for child, making it harder to keep the bonding cycle going. Marriages are often broken under the strain, as each partner accuses the other of causing the child’s problems. Significant depression, exhaustion and anxiety are often reported by adoptive parents raising a child with FAS/E.
The diagnostic characteristics of FAS include specific facial features, deficiencies in growth, and central nervous system (CNS) dysfunction. Children born with this disability may exhibit varying degrees of effect ranging from mild effects and behavioral difficulties to severe cognitive impairment and multiple disabilities.
Out of 1,000 children, 1.9 are born with FAS
In 1990 the National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism estimated that out of 1,000 children, 1.9 are born with FAS. This rate is nearly double the rate of Down Syndrome and five times the rate of Spina Bifida. The rate of FAE is considered to be three times greater than FAS.
"Out of the four million children born each year in the United States, approximately 7, 600 could have FAS and 22, 800 could be affected by FAE," says a 1998 Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) report entitled "Identification of Children with Fetal Alcohol Syndrome and Opportunity for Referral of Their Mothers for Primary Prevention."
A problematic side of prenatal-alcohol-related brain damage is the tendency to lie, which often accompanies tendencies to cheat and steal. “Moral retardation” appears with FAS/E even in families where a child has been adopted in infancy, and consistently taught the values of honesty and respect for people and property. It is one of the most heartbreaking experiences of adoptive families that their children persist in misbehaving despite the best parenting practices possible.
An additional challenge of caring for a child with FAS includes the threat of physical outbursts and violence. The vicious cycle of violence becomes a heightened concern as children grow older and physically stronger.
Parents who Adopt a Child with FAS can Experience Great Joy along with the Challenges
Despite the high number of children diagnosed with FAS and the ramifications associated with the syndrome, parents who choose to adopt or foster a child with an FAS/E can experience great joy along with the challenges. Above all, the child can benefit from a stable, loving home with parents and caregivers who understand his or her needs.
The willingness of couples to remain committed to their relationship while processing difficult periods was considered vital to marital stability. Rather than becoming embroiled in disagreements about child-rearing practices, it is important that couples confirm their commitment to each other and the numerous challenges they face.
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